Burnout

[citrakayah]

I'm tired.

My architecture workload is... exhausting. I feel like I barely manage to get stuff done on time, which is indeed the case. Heck, that's if I manage to get stuff done on time; I didn't for the last project even if I had a valid excuse (funeral). I wasn't the only one; half the class it seems had the same issue. Except they didn't have to go to a funeral.

Same thing for the studio class. The teacher is not happy with the class, and I can hardly blame her. I'm not happy with myself either.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm really made out for this, if this is what everything is going to be like. I don't have the mental ability to be that focused on work only. I should be, and every time I do anything except work I feel a bit guilty, but I don't have that ability, even if other people did, because before I never really needed it.

If I'm not made out for this program... I really don't know what I'll do. Be miserable? My entire future, for the past five or six years, has revolved around the idea that I would be an architect.

There are online communities I'm part of, and I want to read what people are writing and respond to it, but I can't for long periods of time. Because I need to work, and it's one thing to do something that doesn't take large amounts of focus and another thing entirely to actually put thought into something.

And short of posting a short inane reply somewhere--which feels kind of insulting--I feel like I can't reply, because I'm using all my mental and emotional energy on doing the goddamn cross section of a house in AutoCAD.

There are replies, journal entries, posts on the Werelist by people who have put a lot of thought into what they're writing. I feel like I can't do similar.

So... burnout, I guess.

Comments

[yourdeer]

My experience of college was certainly one of nearly all of my energy having to go to my schoolwork. I had a little left on the side for a few personal relationships, but that was it.
I specifically didn't join Werelist or certain other social media sites until after I graduated because I knew I would not have time for them.

I think this is pretty much standard for people who have high standards for themselves and are taking classes full-time.

I don't mean to downplay your discomfort or experiences by saying that. Certainly there are people for whom full-time college is not a good idea, and it's possible that maybe something other than architecture is right for you.
But college is, as far as I know, just kind of that way. It sucks a lot of the time that that's the case, for sure.

[citrakayah]

Actually, it's helpful to know that--since I do, I know that many others have gone through similar things.

[jewelfox]

This society demands too much of people, especially those who are differently abled.

[arawnbheur]

It's okay to take a break even if you've got a project to do. It doesn't have to be a long break, but even 30 minutes can be great. I wish I could find the article, but working something around 50-ish minutes or so and taking 10 minutes to relax enhances productivity. Anyway, if you work too hard all of the time, you'll burn out. Schedule a "me" time because it'll help in the long run.