Oh Fuck

[citrakayah]

So.

Today I was in Physics 203A. Physics 203A is, I might add, very boring. The instructor does a decent impression of a monotone and is generally the type of person who, while perfectly nice and decent, is also not the type of person you would want to teach a class.

I'm struggling to remain focus. I'm fairly sure I'm succeeding.

Then I suddenly discover that everything has changed and twenty minutes of passed.

I don't know what happened. That scares me, because I. Don't. Understand. Did I fall asleep? It didn't feel like falling asleep; while falling asleep I have perception of time passing. The case manager working with me things it could have been a seizure, but surely something like that... I don't know, it seems unlikely. And afterwards, I felt ill. Standing up was a fight, and my stomach was in rebellion.

Oh, and the same day I lost my wallet for a while and ran headfirst into a glass wall.

Comments

[scatteredshells]

I'm not sure of the origins for the theory of #2 but it could be used as a sort of description for #1, really. But rather than calling it a fugue state I'd call it dissociation instead. I don't dissociate thanks to a dissociative disorder (though I do sometimes dissociate during extreme anxiety or a bipolar mood episode) but those do exist -- I dissociate from my surroundings frequently thanks to the ADHD. And when I do space out, time seems as though it ceases to exist, at least from my perceptual angle. Or else it seems to move so slowly. Hence the joking phrase: "in ADHD there are two senses of time. Now, and Not Now."